Dear Pollicle Dogs,
In response to your recent letter, might I ask how you dogs learned how to read? Those thoughts were intended for human eyes only. Furthermore, might I suggest you get a sense of humour and appreciate a little irony. While you can read, you haven’t acquired a good understanding of the subtleties of human speak as yet.
Had you read deeper in between the lines, you would have understood, that I was actually taking a stand against dog owners using their beloved canines as fashion accessories. You have no idea how many dogs end up being destroyed each year, simply because they no longer match the lounge or the latest New York and Paris trends.
Most of these accessory dogs are also birthed in dreadful puppy farms where the poor Mummy dogs do nothing but keep birthing pups.
Dogs aren’t money-making machines.
Indeed, my accountant has actually declared my beloved pooch, Misty “a loss”. Although, naturally to me, she is naturally a “gain”.
I hope we’re friends again.
PS I just had Le Salon on the phone complaining that you’re being difficult AGAIN!! Remember, Bilbo, you’re not a star…yet! You know what that means!