Courage At The End

Most of us have not had the privilege of caring for the dying. I was so moved by this beatiful story of caring for a loving husband and wife at the end xx Rowena

Sidereal Catalyst

They had hospital beds side by side in their apartment at the nursing home where they lived.  She had end-stage bone cancer, barely holding onto life.  He was diagnosed with failure to thrive, the only thing he was holding onto in this life was her.

She had weeks to live and every moment was wrought with pain.  They both had 24-hour care and the hospice nurses used everything at their disposal to make her comfortable.  Her words were barely audible and she was bed bound.  She had to be moved every few hours to avoid bedsores but every movement was agonizing.  He was constantly concerned about her, wanting to be near her, hoping to depart this world at the very moment she did.  He made that clear, announcing that he did not want to live a moment past her last breath – though his health indicated he would.  

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3 thoughts on “Courage At The End

  1. New Journey

    Working in the healthcare system for over 30 years has brought me so much pleasure, joy and compassion for those I cared for….I chose the geriatric generation and never looked back…to be the one holding the hand of someone facing death, changes who you are, makes you face the reality of life….I have the honor to be part of many people passing….I have been part of many different types of rituals held at death, even was part of a ” living funeral” …it was hard to understand it, the family were spread all over the world and with both there parents reaching the end of there life, while the entire family were together they had a double living funeral….I must say it was lovely, the parents were very touched and the children really grieved together for what was to come…..being part of these lovely, elderly residents was such a special part of my life…..very touching story, and I agree, it is so hard to keep the personal feelings out of caring for them…..I have cried for many, laughed with many and just listened as they needed to be heard….. man has this dug up memories…..both happy and sad….xxkat

  2. Rowena Post author

    Wow! I didn’t know you’d done that. It’s an area I’m very intrigued by, fueled by my health problems, of course. I feed research to my anxious mind and it eventually calms it down. I guess you could then go on to say that my writing is like an enormous burp! I know I can say that to you, my friend! My mother would be horrified and my son impressed!
    You were very brave working with people facing the end of the road and losing people you grew close to. At the same, that intimacy is truly what it means to be human and that involves risk, loss, grief but also brings joy, laughter and meaning!
    Take care xx Ro

  3. New Journey

    It was a life changing experience…what I found more often than not is that no matter how much money you have ( I worked at a very elite buy in healthcare foundation) you always almost die alone….these people had the money to care for them selves up to the end….and the mind set of the family was they were cared for so they didn’t need to be present at the end of life…..very sad….I was so happy to be part of their daily life, the ups and the downs….don’t get me wrong for every 10 there would be a couple families that the kids were present…when my mom passed, she was in a nursing home, we were always very present in her life…my sister lived in the same town so she was there 2 – 3 times a day…and we took mom out for dinners, rides, and up to the house..until her dementia kicked in then we didn’t take her out very often as she was a pistol to get back to the home…LOL…but when her end of life time arrived….we camped out in her room for a week…I wouldn’t let anyone else do care for her, only me…my sister and I was always there,.I think it made a difference in her passing…so that was off topic…LOL but I felt it an honor to care for the elderly and be there in their last days of life…I started working as an aide before the CNA program was developed….I did that for years, then changed to administration, I was the Medical Records Director at this retirement home I was at for 21 years….however I was always available for the residents…and spent many a night sitting with the sick…feels really good to make a difference in some ones life…sorry I was a little long winded…and I love reading your burps of stories…..LOL kat

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