Happy Anniversary – 19 Years On…

It was our 19th Wedding Anniversary on Wednesday a figure which automatically takes me through to next year which will be our 20th and worthy of all the pomp, circumstance and luxurious travel it deserves. At this juncture, I don’t know whether I’m looking forward to the same time next year, or whether we should be carpe diem seizing the day while the going is good. After all, everything is relative and 2020 hasn’t been our worst year by a country mile.

Rather, while there have certainly been some struggles, we’ve also had some surprising good luck and overall I think we’re coming out ahead. Not that this stops us from being very conscious of the horrors, disappointments and draining inconveniences which are still being endured globally. However, I don’t want to appeal to the sympathy vote ourselves when compassion, understanding, financial support and love really need to be channeled towards those who need it most and that isn’t us.

However, I did want to celebrate and acknowledge that Geoff and I have made it this far. Share that we actually did manage to get out for an indulgent, romantic lunch at our favourite special venue…the Impact Plans Cafe at nearby Empire Bay. Although we’ve had quite a few luxurious sunny days, this wasn’t one of them. Indeed, it was cold and wet and we even wondered whether the cafe would still be open for a late lunch after Geoff had attended a zoom meeting for work. However, it was like they were just waiting for us and only a couple of tables were taken, which was wonderful in terms of staying covid safe. I’m naturally cautious about going to cafes even though there’s virtually no known covid around here.

As I considered this post, I wondered whether to to put the wedding photo first as the featured image, or whether to start off with our older, more decrepit selves and then flash back to Cinderella and Prince Charming on their big day when, to use the Australian vernacular “we scrubbed up awlright”.

Knowing what lies ahead, I feel tired just looking at those two naive “babes in the woods”. This is actually how my father refers to himself and my mother when my birth started going horribly wrong like an express train accelerating straight over cliff, except I was stuck and not moving anywhere. I can relate to that ourselves looking back. No matter how prepared or cocky you might be, you simply have no idea what’s going to hit you right between the eyes. That’s what we should have been prepared for, instead of thinking about a five year plan. 

Nineteen years down the track, it only natural to ask whether we’d go back and do it all again?

“Can it be that it was all so simple then
Or has time rewritten every line
If we had the chance to do it all again
Tell me, would we?
Could we?” 

-The Way We Were. 

Or, would we run, possibly even in two opposite directions?

I don’t know. There’s a big part of me now that thinks Geoff and I should’ve boarded a yacht and just kept sailing continuously out towards the sunset. Don’t go chasing rainbows. Stand tall like a sunflower and stare deep into those rays and not turn round.

However, I suspect this life of simplicity, without the love and responsibilities of becoming parents, wouldn’t be as rich. That a life well-lived is a textured tapestry filled with ups and downs and no one’s trajectory usually keeps just going up and up.

That’s not to say I’ve given up. As a writer, I still believe in stories and one day I’ll get there after all these years of scribbling and tapping away. I’ll have that published book clutched firm in the palm of my hand.

I don’t know what that has to do with our wedding anniversary, except I do. Our marriage is a partnership and due to my disability and severe health conditions, I haven’t been able to work in the way I expected and to maintain my career in marketing. Indeed, after going through chemo and almost giving up the ghost a few times, it no longer seemed quite so relevant either. I didn’t care how many widgets were sold. I wanted people to be content. I wanted our world to be a better place. All the extra layers of fluff really didn’t matter most of the time. That good loving, caring relationships were more important and I also felt I had a lot to relay through my writing and research. Not just my own observations and opinions, but also those gathered up along the road. Wisdom, after all, is a collective “being”. It’s not just the product of one mind.

Meanwhile, I want to go and dig up our wedding photos etc and show the kids. We also have our wedding video which we’ve never edited and have certainly never shown the kids or any of our current friends. I wonder what they’ll think of the two glamorous love birds? I wonder if they even see a glimpse of us?

Best wishes,


21 thoughts on “Happy Anniversary – 19 Years On…

  1. maxwellthedog

    Congratulations you two! I vote for celebrating right now. Eat dessert first, carpe that diem. Then do it again on the 20th. Iguess we’ll never know what life would have been like had we taken other forks in the road but I am big believer in the Kris Kristoffer song lyrics: “From the rocking of the cradle to the rolling of the hearse, the going up was worth the coming down.” Cheers!

  2. Rowena Post author

    The words of that song are great. I listened to one version which sounded like an outback church service 50 years ago. Don’t listen to a lot of country but I definitely agree that the going up is worth the coming down and that you have to get out there and have a go, even if it wears thin at times.
    I had a laugh about what you said about eating dessert first, because even though I’m pretty relaxed and not one to stick to protocol, having dessert first almost feels like a capitol crime and highly decadent and just plain”naughty”. My family went to Norfolk Island when I was about 12 and we found this dessert we really liked which was very much like a Sara Lee Chocolate Bavarian and each of us would have two servings of that. In other words…TWO DESSERTS!! Yippee! That was pretty decadent as well.
    Meanwhile, I’m eating my breakfast of strawberries, banana and a handful of toasted muesli. Had fish and chips for dinner last night and have been invited out for fish & chips for lunch though I might have something else. The grease didn’t agree with my heartburn last night and I’m not even old yet.

  3. Rowena Post author

    Wow. My Dad was one of 7 and mum one of four. So, just with close family alone, it was going to be big. It’s a shame we’ve lost touch with a lot of the friends we invited along. For us, getting married signalled moving about an hour away and we were in our own world for awhile. It was quite a turning point, which I guess it’s meant to be. You just don’t quite realize how until after the event.
    Best wishes,

  4. Rowena Post author

    Thank you very much. I should get some of those wedding photos printed on a tshirt. Really this is me. Not was me. Still the same person on the inside.

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